This Sunday (20) we celebrate the International Day of Happiness. In such stressful times, it is normal for anyone to wonder if it is possible to be happy. Writer Luiz Gaziri, 43, is dedicated to researching rigorously this topic: the science behind happiness. According to the researcher, some practical measures can be taken on a daily basis to find more satisfaction in life, despite the difficulties that everyone faces.
It was his corporate career that made Ghaziri wake up to this topic. Before devoting himself to scientific research on happiness, the CEO worked with People Management.
And at a challenging time in his career, in 2004, he decided to search for motivation on the internet and came across a scholarly article on the subject. It didn’t stop anymore. “My work as an administrator has ignited this passion to better understand human behavior,” he said. R7.
In 2013, Ghaziri ended his career at the company to devote himself exclusively to the topic, for which he has already received two books, The Science of Happiness (Farrow Editorial, 2019) and The Seven Principles of Happiness (Faro Editorial, 2020).
Motivation and happiness
Before explaining the seven principles that can help anyone be happier, Al Jaziri explains that there is an intrinsic link between motivation and happiness. “Motivation is what makes us act. When we have the motivation, we enter a more productive state,” he explains. “Happiness is the joy that I feel while acting,” he adds.
Ghaziri researched more than 1,200 scientific articles before authoring his work, and studies continue: During the phone interview, the author was in the United States interviewing scientists to produce a new book to be released by the end of this year.
“Brazilians in particular have a very simplified idea of how happiness works. We believe there will be a solution that will solve all problems. If I was rich, I would be happier, more beautiful, etc. But money is only one variable, there are hundreds It is another item that I can use and that will bring me more happiness,” he thinks. Therefore, he chose to base his books on scholarly research, with an approach applicable to everyday life.
“Man is an adaptive machine. Happiness is a living thing, and it constantly renews itself,” teaches the author, who breaks down the seven principles of happiness below:
1) Knowing how to buy happiness
The first principle is interesting: spending money on someone else brings more happiness than buying something for yourself. “It’s the opposite of what many people imagine, but studies show that using your resources on behalf of another individual is very rewarding,” he says. But this does not mean that it is not necessary and important to satisfy yourself – the question here is how to use resources to be happier. According to Ghaziri, in addition to spending on others, using money to buy experiences brings more happiness.
“When I invest in theater, travel, shows, restaurants, I feel happier than buying material goods, because that feeling lasts forever. The pleasure of buying a car doesn’t last long, but the moments experienced on a trip, for example, make them unforgettable.”
2) gratitude
Ghaziri explains that it has been scientifically proven that being grateful brings more happiness. “Many studies show that including the five things we are grateful for every night in a notebook makes us happier,” he says. In addition, another finding suggests that when we personally express gratitude for something good someone has done for us, we begin to feel happy.
“But it has to be alive. I usually say that gratitude happens offline, whether it’s writing in a notebook before bed, or talking to someone in person. Happiness always increases when we come face to face with someone we’re grateful for,” he says.
And in times when it is entirely mediated by the Internet, such as today, physical existence cannot and should not be ignored. “It doesn’t matter how many people you interact with online, what really matters, for happiness, is who the people in your life are face to face.”
3) recognition
This is a principle, in a way, related to the second, and it involves realizing what others have done well, not just for us. For example, if your co-worker did a great project, sincerely congratulating him on it will bring you happiness …!
“Acknowledgment works the opposite way we think. Scientists have found that we are much happier when we realize what other people have done than waiting for others to recognize you for something you did. This applies to small actions in everyday life, like praising someone, being kind. This is something that brings us All very happy.”
“Gratitude involves what is going on in my life, appreciating more of what I already have rather than wanting more and more. Acknowledgment is different, it is more in the sense of expressing the importance of others in our lives, and expressing admiration. Preferably in person. Being present is always better. A way to be happy.
4) Help
“We are happier when we help others than when we receive help from other people. The principle of recognition also includes this: In order to be recognized, I need someone’s help. And when I give this sincere help, people have something to do to give back. And that goes up” Ghaziri says.
The author commented on a study in which scientists found that when a small group started helping others in the workplace, that group that received help automatically started helping others as well. And imagine what? He says, “He who was the happiest was the one who helped, not the one who was helped.”
5) Relationships
According to Ghaziri, the principle of relationships is one of the most important principles of the search for happiness. He cited a study conducted by Harvard University in the United States that began in 1938 and is collecting data to this day.
“They wanted to understand what makes some people have longevity, live many years and in good health. So, they discovered that a key factor in this is the quality of relationships a person develops throughout their life,” Ghaziri says.
“So, analyzing everything, when I spend my money with someone, when I realize the value of the person around me, when I help the other, it is all about building relationships. And what do we do these days? Grow our relationships or the cell phone?”
Again, here comes the importance of being. According to the author, studies show that having a conversation with a stranger, in the waiting room for a medical appointment, for example, makes a person happier than if he exchanged this connection to browse social networks or watch a movie on his mobile phone.
“There are endless opportunities to build a happier life, and grow relationships. When I care about interacting with someone I don’t know, the person I interact with is also much happier. It will pass on that happiness to others, generating what we call the contagion effect. That is, the kind action of you does not It stops at that person, it will pass on to another person, which will pass on to a third person. Nothing replaces human contact!”
6) Positive feelings
Ghaziri explains that according to his studies, happiness occurs when we achieve a greater balance between positive and negative emotions. But then, many may wonder? How hard is it to build more positive moments? The author explains: “Our human view is always more focused on tragedy, bad news, low scores… It’s what’s called a negativity bias.”
“This is related to our ancestors. As a species, to survive, we had to pay attention, all the time, to what could happen. It was a constant state of alert. Today we no longer need to act like this, but continue to work through the bias of negativity.” To get out of that into a “positive balance,” Ghaziri suggests applying what scientists call a “positivity ratio.”
“To be happy, we need to ratio three positive moments to one negative, every day. In other words: it’s not about avoiding bad things, they will happen, like it or not. But it is possible to be prepared to face them. Negative facts, such as a breakup or illness. or expulsion.
Therefore, on a daily basis, it is necessary to strive to build as many positive events as possible, using other principles, such as spending money on other people, being grateful for what is good in your life, recognizing the efforts of others, etc.
“This way, when the negative moment comes, the brain will know how to get over the situation. When I actively build moments of happiness, I prepare myself for the inevitable bad in life.”
7) Negative thinking
Here we have the most controversial principle: According to Ghaziri, negative thinking is a way to be happier. but how? “There is confusion in people’s minds about being positive and thinking positive,” he says.
“To be positive is to be someone who builds many moments of happiness, i.e. to have a higher 3-to-1 balance in their daily life. However, positive thinking is the belief that just because you want something so powerful, the universe will conspire in your favour”, He adds.
Although common sense says that “positive thinking” is required to achieve any goal, scientific evidence suggests that this is an illusion, and may even be harmful. According to Ghaziri, when a person imagines something they really want, it activates areas of the brain associated with pleasure. That is, the person thinks something positive, feels good and ends up relaxing, as if the brain understood that he had already achieved the goal.
And when we rest, we lose motivation. That’s where negative thinking comes in: It’s OK to have a positive thought, but right after that, it’s important to train the brain to think of the worst-case scenario possible for this situation. What difficulties will I face? What obstacles will I face along the way?”, Ghaziri points out.
Instead of relaxing, a person begins to think better about exits, actions and plans, which leads him to achieve his goal more easily. “Scientists call it mental contrast, meaning that negative thinking can help you be happier.”
Finally, as an extra tip, Gaziri reminds you that the ratio of positivity is 3 to 1, not 3 to zero. “Why is that? Because a little stress helps us act, move toward what we want. We need a little challenge, otherwise life will lose its fun — and motivation — quickly, and we won’t be happy.”