The author of the book offers 3 tips for finding a job you love

How do you stop being unhappy at work? Is it possible to make money and find the purpose of your business? These and other issues are discussed by American writer Bruce Feiler, author of Finding: Finding Meaningful Work in a Post-Career Career.

MA in International Relations from the University of Cambridge, UK. Journalist Bruce Feiler is the author of seven New York Times bestsellers, including Life in Transition, Secrets of Happy Families, and Advice for Parents. His three TED Talks have been viewed over four million times, and he teaches the “Ted How to Master Life Transitions” course.

In an exclusive interview with EstadaoIn , Feiler shares tips on how to find a job you love and discusses the power of new generations to change the way people view work.

Read below the key excerpts from the interview and learn the 3 essential questions you should ask to define your career.

I think it mainly includes three main elements.

1) Look back. A story that includes the past, present and future. So, telling the story of the past involves asking an interesting question: What positive and negative things did you learn about working with your parents? Some may have learned that it is important to work hard based on their parents, but they may also have realized that they were not happy with what they were doing or that it was a stressor on the family. It’s a simple question, and it will give you an idea of ​​what’s important to you.

2) It is important to look at the present. So maybe you can ask yourself: Am I at a point in my life where I want to prioritize money, family, or creativity? It’s a simple question that will help you determine where you are right now.

3) You have to ask some questions about the future. As you look to the future, you may wonder if you want to do work that contributes to making the world a better place, work with interesting colleagues, or help save the planet. Ask these questions, because the answer to what you want is already within you, and your job is to help you discover it.

I think covid has accelerated the change that has been happening for some time. While most people over 50 say, “Oh, young people don’t work hard and they don’t have a good commitment to working hard,” the truth is that millennials and Generation Z have saved the working world.

We over 50s were raised with the idea that work should be miserable, that you shouldn’t like your job, or that you should prioritize your work over your life. Young people are turning away from this idea. They want a job that gives them meaning and allows them flexibility and balance in their lives. This is a necessary and very welcome change.

This means that the traditional concept of profession, which arose about a hundred years ago during migration from rural areas to cities, is no longer applicable to the way people live today. The idea of ​​getting into a job in your early 20s and sticking to it for the next 50 years is no longer the norm. Instead, throughout their lives, people encounter what I call “temporary work” many times, wondering if they are on the right track and considering new opportunities.

Every two and a half years, on average, there are reflections on current work and possible changes. You will ask yourself over and over if you are doing what you want to do, if you want a new job at your company, if you want to drop everything and start something new. It doesn’t always mean that you’re going to make a career shift and change careers completely, but the idea that you have to do something for 50 is no longer there.

I think what happens is we define success almost exclusively in financial terms. Well, that’s a hit, how much money you make or the size of your house or something. While this may be important, it is not always important, and at different times in our lives we need to rethink our idea of ​​what it means to be successful.

We have to understand that sometimes you want to prioritize money, while other times you can prioritize family or you can prioritize community or creativity. So it’s not that money or getting to the top is never important, but it’s not always the most important thing in making a decision. Success isn’t about status, it’s the story you tell yourself about what’s most important to you.

This is a tough question. I think the answer is that you have to let go of the idea that there is only one success story and accept that everyone defines success differently. It is necessary to stop getting involved in someone else’s dream and start chasing your own. Deciding what your dream is is the hard part, but it’s also achievable. Following someone else’s dream is tempting, but it’s not the right path. It may look easy when you look at it from the outside, but it really isn’t.

I think the most important aspect of dreams is that they change over time. What you dream about at the age of 20 can be different at the age of 30, 50 or 60. This year marks the 15th anniversary of my diagnosis of cancer at the age of 43, which was not in my plans. At the time, I had two identical twin daughters at the age of three. Suddenly my dreams had to change. Today, I got an email from someone who just found out they have a terminal illness and also have young children.

The most problematic career advice is “follow your passion”, and this is bad career advice because 90% of people change their passion over time, discover a new passion, or simply decide on something else that is more important. I mean, how many women do we know who started working and then had kids and said, “I want to spend more time with my kids than I do my job”? And in the old days, it used to be said like, “Well, sorry if you did that, but you’re going to have to quit your job. You can never come back.” Why should it be? We need to be more flexible to accommodate changes in our dreams and expectations.

We talk to people about finding work, and it’s all about fixing up your resume or your LinkedIn profile and things like that, but we don’t give people the tools they need. How do they decide what is meaningful to them, and how are they going to decide which action will bring them joy? And so what I’ve tried to do in Research is create a toolkit that allows you to identify what makes you meaningful and what makes you happy.

Also, I hope people give themselves permission to be confident in their beliefs. When I ask people what is the best advice they receive for a job transfer, the first answer is to believe in yourself. You already know the answer. If you’re unhappy, you’re already writing a new story. You have to give yourself permission to trust your instincts and make the change you feel you want to make.